Avoid Jealousy to Gain Confidence

Whether you're running your own shop or working in an office, to be happy you have to make your career your own. Set your own goals, focus on your strengths and take charge as the captain of your own ship. As captain, you need to be confident in where you're going and what you're doing. Gaining confidence can take time, and the surest way to crush it is to compare yourself to others. 

It is easy to look at what someone else is doing and wish you were there, too. Believe me, I get bitten by the jealousy bug from time to time. But all jealousy will do is make you lose sight of what you already have. I'm making my living as a writer while working around my kids' schedules. This is what I've always wanted, yet I am guilty of looking at projects other freelancers are working on or books others are publishing and feel like I'm not doing enough.

When I find myself wishing I had more time in the day or that I was doing work more like someone else's, I try to take a step back and simply be grateful for what I already have. The truth is, it doesn't matter what others in my field are doing. My career goals and priorities are different from theirs, so it is only logical that my achievements will be as well. More importantly, their accomplishments won't  keep me from being successful. So when jealousy rears its ugly head, I simply acknowledge it and remind myself that I'm charting my own course at my own pace. In turn, I can be truly happy for someone else's achievements and use them as inspiration. They say a rising tide lifts all ships and another writer's success may ultimately increase mine. 

Photo by Robert Linder from stock.xchange

 

6 thoughts on “Avoid Jealousy to Gain Confidence

  1. This post really resonated with me.  It is so easy for me to compare myself with all the blogs and such I read.  And it is easy for me to decide I don't stack up.  But you are so right, I won't get anywhere with that thinking!  It's a better use of my time to focus on me – and be happy for others!

  2. This is a good reminder. I think it's almost impossible to NOT compare yourself to others, especially if you're a self-employed freelancer, but I have to remind myself that when I do that, I need to compare apples to apples. For instance, I am frequently envious of a certain colleague who publishes more than I do, but she doesn't have 2 small kids like I do. So, yeah, I'm charting a different course and that's fine.

  3. This is a good reminder. I think it's almost impossible to NOT compare yourself to others, especially if you're a self-employed freelancer, but I have to remind myself that when I do that, I need to compare apples to apples. For instance, I am frequently envious of a certain colleague who publishes more than I do, but she doesn't have 2 small kids like I do. So, yeah, I'm charting a different course and that's fine.

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